We have talked to thousands of people about safety over the years and have learned a thing or two about how to talk about it in a way that is encouraging and open instead of fear-mongering. We created this guide of some quick do’s and don’ts about giving the gift of Flare. If you are someone who has given a safety-related gift before and gotten an eye roll or a “you worry too much” response, then this article might be helpful to you.
Do: Use Flare as an opportunity to acknowledge that the situations that come up around personal safety are complex and unique to each person. Flare users tell us that they love getting Flare as a gift because it means their loved ones want them to feel confident putting themselves out there and living their lives fully. When we think about the value of safety, it is not just in preventing violence, but in enabling our users to go after their goals and the life that they want. Use this opportunity to show your loved one that you trust them and their decision making and that you don’t want them to have to make compromises for their safety.
Don’t: We find that telling your loved one that they need to carry a safety device with them everywhere they go tends to feel patronizing. Everyone has a version of their own personal safety toolkit: from using their voice to friends, coworkers, and family looking out for them, and more. Try talking to your loved one about Flare as another tool that provides them with more choice to decide what is right for them in a discreet way. It is about not having to jeopardize their reputation and success in an environment if they are feeling pressured to go along with a situation where someone is making them feel uncomfortable, but they don’t know how to stop it.
We built Flare to help people feel great about taking more active choices for their safety and wellbeing – to promote safety as a means to empower people to tap into their agency. We suggest you talk about Flare not as another thing your loved one has to do, but as an active decision they can make to join a movement of people who are looking out for themselves and their community.
Do: Instead of talking about emergencies and what-if situations, use this opportunity to ask your loved one about how they experience safety. Safety has often been equated with emergencies when in reality the vast majority of experiences people have are in familiar places, where intentions are unclear and expectations can be misaligned. The definition of safety is changing. Have an open dialogue about how safety situations almost never feel clear-cut and what options they have in the moment when they start to feel unsure. Flare provides users with more optionality to create an easy out of an uncomfortable situation earlier before things escalate.
Don’t: We do not recommend that you ask your loved one to add you to their Crew in the app. The Crew is the group of contacts that we will notify if the user presses and holds the hidden button on their Flare. They get put on a text chain where they can see the user's location and are asked to check-in on the user. We deliberately do not use alarmist language when we message the Crew because that reduces the mental barriers for the user to feel comfortable activating the feature earlier in the moment.
We know that people are more likely to activate the message earlier in the moment if they don't feel pressured to add certain people to their Crew. To reduce the barriers for your loved one to take action sooner when they start to get a bad feeling in their gut, we suggest that you encourage them to make their own decision putting whoever they trust and feel most comfortable with in their Crew.
Questions? Reach out to us at firstname.lastname@example.org